will power is for people who don't want to get laid
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
