I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Randomize
