I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
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