i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
