I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
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