Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
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