If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
You should frame my arrest warrant.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Randomize
