if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
If its not for food we ain't going out.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
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