but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I think I sprained my soul last night
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Randomize
