And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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