C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
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