I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
Randomize