I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
Randomize
