Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
