I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Randomize
