U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
I DEMAND FORESKIN
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