My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
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