I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Randomize
