So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
