My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Randomize
