I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize
