Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Randomize
