they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
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