Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Randomize
