the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
