Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Randomize