You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I pour the whiskey from now on
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
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