Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Randomize
