The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Randomize
