I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Randomize
