Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
