New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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