I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
Randomize
