Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Church boner. Awkwardddd
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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