Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Randomize