you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Randomize
