He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
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