This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
