oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Randomize
