Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
