i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Randomize
