I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
Randomize
