normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
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