There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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