Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
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