my mouth tastes like poor choices
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Randomize
