Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
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