i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
