party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Randomize
