I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
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